Thursday, December 14, 2017

Prim & Hagen Birth Story Part III - Grand Finale!

Continued ....

Around 3AM my contractions started back up.  It was pretty evident that we weren't going to be able to stop labor.  Off and on through the night I would have contractions.  It wasn't anything regular but I was definitely in labor.  Sometime in the early morning Erik's parents came to visit.  Erik hadn't planned to stay the night when he came to the hospital on Saturday so he hadn't brought anything with him.  His parents got a list and drove back up to our house to get his stuff.  I called my mom to let her know what was going on.  She came down to the hospital as well.  My OB showed up to check on me mid morning.  He checked me and declared that I was at a 2.5 (remember that I was at a 1 when I checked into the hospital).  A 2.5!  That's it?!?  I had been in labor all night and morning! Ugh!  Then I heard him say to the nurse that 2.5 was a very generous measurement.  He said that I could get an epidural when I got to a 4 or 5.  It was going to be a long day!

Erik had a football game on and everyone was just hanging out.  At some point Erik asked why all the flags were at half mast.  It was 9/11!  NO!  I can't have my babies on 9/11.  It is a sad holiday.  I was progressing so slowly that my nurse comforted me by telling me that she doubted if I had these babies before midnight.

It was a stormy Sunday.  Around noon there was a big micro burst that hit Provo and knocked the power out.  My room had big windows so there was plenty of light.  But the hallways and bathrooms were dark.  The generators kicked on to keep all essential equipment running.  Air conditioning is not considered essential.  I was starting to have some pretty serious contractions.  15 months later its hard to even remember what it was like.  I just remember Erik's parents and my mom being in the room.  As soon as one would start I would call Erik to my side and he would help me through it.  I remember crying after one of the contractions and telling Erik that I just wanted to go home.  I was tired from several sleepless nights.  I was hungry because I hadn't eaten anything since the night before.  I was in pain and so very uncomfortable.  I just wanted my own bed! 

At some point in the day my strep test had come back and of course it was positive.  So I was started on my first round of antibiotics.  Luckily I was progressing slowly enough that we were confident that I would get all the doses needed before the babies were born.

Late afternoon, sometime around 3:00 or 4:00 I think, the nurse checked me.  I was finally at a 4!  I could get an epidural.  Before getting pregnant with twins I really wanted to try and have a baby un-medicated, just for the experience.  But once we found out that we were having twins that didn't really seem like a wise option.  My OB highly recommended an epidural because of the possibility of having an emergency c-section.  At this point in my labor I was ready.  I had essentially been in labor on and off for two days.  I was exhausted!  I had watched my best friend get an epidural so I had an idea of what was about to happen .... so I thought!  It was HORRIBLE!!  I don't really even know how to explain it.  It was incredibly painful.  My head was buried in Erik's chest as I screamed!  I am not a big screamer.  I don't generally scream in pain.  But this was different.  Two nurses came running into my room to see what was going on. I felt Erik drop his head onto mine not being able to do anything but hold me.  Knowing what I know now I would have waited longer to get it or not gotten one at all.  Within minutes my left side was completely numb!  But NOT my right side. I could feel everything on my right side.  So now my left side was painfully numb (who knew that numbness could be painful) and my right side was still feeling all the contractions.  They tried rolling me on my side to see if that would help.  It didn't.  (Remember that the power is still out and there is no air circulating.)  My nurse called my OB to give a report.  He told her to check me again around 8pm.  I was still progressing very slowly.  My mom was rubbing my numb leg while Erik rubbed my back.  While I was miserable I was still hoping to hold off until after midnight so their birthday would not be on 9/11.  The next few hours were pretty much a blur.  Around 7:00 pm my nurse came in to help me re-position and adjust the babies monitors.  While she was there she decided to check me even
though it was earlier than the doctor had said.  SURPRISE! I was at a 9/10.  It was go time!  WHAT?  How did I go from a four to a 10 so fast?  I thought epidurals slowed things down?  Well not necessarily!  My nurse said that me relaxing probably just helped things move along.  She instructed someone to call my OB and for Erik to start suiting up.  Because I was having twins I had to deliver in the OR with two OB's.  Erik had to be ready for a c-section just in case.  Oh yeah, still no power or AC.  The anesthesiologist was called back in and gave me a boost to my epidural and then took it out.  It worked and my right side was finally numb!  Well it looks like these babies were going to be born on 9/11 after all. From the minute I knew that it was time I was panicked that my doctor wouldn't make it on time.  I kept asking where he was.  I was wheeled to the OR and everything was set up.  The NICU was alerted that they were getting 31.3 week twins.  We were ready.  Still no doctor.  Completely panicked I asked where he was and what happens if he doesn't make it.  I was assured he would make it in time.  "I can feel the baby coming out!" I was actually still on my side and had no idea if a baby was coming out.  But I was convinced that I was going to have this baby right then.  I am sure the nurses were rolling their eyes! I begged them to tell me what would happen if he didn't make it.  They told me that an on call doctor would step in.  "But I don't know that guy and I don't want him delivering my babies!"  I heard my nurse tell someone to go see if they can find Dr. Young and to tell him to hurry! At last!  Dr. Young walked through the door.  "Where have you been?!?"  (It was a good 30 minutes before baby A was born by the way.)  They got me up in the stirrups and gave both Erik and I instructions.  I had an awesome L&D nurse.  The power had come back on but there still was no AC.  I was dying and trying to rip my hospital gown off.  The second OB found a clipboard and used it to fan me.  He was heaven sent!  The monitor that was suppose to be monitoring my contractions was not working.  So the nurse put her hand on my stomach and told us when I was having a contraction.  For the next 30 minutes I pushed and pushed and pushed.  "Why won't she come out?  She is only 3 lbs!"  It turns out that small babies can actually be really hard to get out.  There is not enough baby for your body to push against.  My temperature had been creeping up for the last hour.  If I became fevered they would do a c-section.  A nurse checked my temp between each contraction.  I was .1 away from being considered fevered during my entire delivery.  I had to push so hard to get her to move down that I started to pass out.  Erik said he would watch my eyes roll back in my head when I stopped pushing.  To help me recover between pushes I was put on oxygen.  At some point I might have something like, "When I create a world and life this is NOT how this is going to work!"  And I meant it!  Erik was so calm and collected.  He did a great job comforting me and encouraging me.  In between pushes Erik and Dr. Young talked about the previous nights football game until I yelled "I am having a baby!"  Dr Young  is awesome by the way.  He is so clam and chill.  At last they could see the head!  Erik got to take a peek and see his baby girls dark hair.  With one more push she was out.  The moment she came out she cried out a little cry.  It was the best sound in the world!  We didn't know what to expect with them being so early and small.  A cry was best case scenario.  Dr Young quickly cut her cord, handed her over to a nurse and off she went.  I lifted my head just in time to get a quick glimpse of my baby.  Before all this Erik and I had agreed that he would go with the baby.

As soon as baby A was out the other OB and the nurse grabbed my stomach to hold baby B in place.  He was already head down so we didn't want him to flip.  While the nurse held baby B, the second doctor started to push him down.  This is when I was really glad I did have an epidural.  Let's just say they were not being gentle.  Poor baby B (Hagen) was not ready to come out.  He was kicking against their hands.  Dr Young ended up breaking his water as they pushed him down.  I have no idea how long of a break I had before I started to push again.  As soon as they told me to start pushing again I had one of the nurses get Erik from the other room.  He came in and let me know that baby girl was doing well.  Round two:  I started pushing again.  I was SO tired.  I didn't know how in the world I was going to do this again!  After pushing several times I told Erik that I couldn't do it.  He told me that as soon as I pushed him out I could have a Diet Coke.  One my next contraction I push with everything I had in me.  Out he came!  Dr Young said, "I can't believe that actually worked!"  Baby B was born almost exactly 30 minutes after baby A.  He gave us a good cry letting us know he was not happy to be out.  Just like baby A I only got a glance as they rushed baby B out to assess him.  Erik followed them so that he could get some pictures and a report.  Within seconds of baby B being born the AC came back on.

Dr Young told me just to relax and let my body take care of delivering the placentas.  My epidural was starting to wear off.  The pressure was incredible.  It was such a weird feeling.  I am not sure how to describe it.  I asked the nurse to get Erik again.  He came back in and let me know that baby B was doing great.  They had both been put on oxygen and were being taken to the NICU.  I was cleaned up and stitched up (yes I tore both horizontally and vertically, needing one stitch each direction.  Can you imagine if I had had full term babies?) and taken back to my room where my mom and Erik's parents were waiting for us.  They had been waiting outside the OR and got a little glimpse of the babies as they were being taken to the NICU.  As promised I got a Diet Coke when I got back to my room.  My sweet nurse had one waiting for me.  I got the shakes SO bad after delivery.  My nurse kept telling me not to fight it and that it was very normal.  Your body has been through a lot.  Erik had taken a video babies so that I could see them.  I had to wait until my shaking had stopped and my epidural was worn off before I could go see my babies. About an hour later I released from L&D and taken to the NICU to meet my babies for the first time.

Primrose was named that night.  We kinda knew all along that that would be her name.  She was born at 8:52 pm.  She was 3.9 lbs and 16 inches long.  When I first saw her she had an IV in her hand, a feeding tube in her nose and was on a CPAP to help her little lungs.  She was the tiniest baby I had ever seen.

Hagen was named the next day.  He was just baby boy until we finalized the name  He was born at 9:23 pm.  He was 3.14 lbs and 16 inches long.  He also had an IV, feeding tube and was on CPAP.  It broke my heart knowing that he was not ready to come out but had to.

I was not able to hold either baby that night.  I didn't get to have immediate skin to skin with my babies.  I didn't get to do delayed cord cutting like I had planned.  Erik didn't get to cut his babies cords.  I didn't have that instant bond or that feeling of unconditional love that people talk about.  Nothing had gone as I had planned or wanted or hoped.  It was nothing like I had imagined or like other birth stories I had heard.  But my babies, the babies that I dreamed of having, that we had so desperately wanted, the babies that we had worked so hard to get were here!  They were doing well and we would all be ok!  I had no idea how much my heart would grow becoming a mom.

The story continues but I will save that for another post.

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